Must Know Before Marrying someone based on Love

In our time and age, love is seen as the only valid and accepted reason to marry someone and to decide to commit to a long-term relationship with them, anyone who does not primarily marry for love is seen as poor, deceiving and unlucky, however, marrying someone for love is perfectly fine as long as it’s not the only reason you are marrying them, here are two things you must know before marrying someone based on love:

“Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides.”

- Louis de Bernières

Truth be told, as much as we hate to believe or admit, love will eventually end, you can fall out of love in few weeks or even days! we have all heard of couples who divorced after few weeks-months, this is because something that is temporary cannot be a sole base/root of a relationship,  this excludes love from being the main and only ingredient for a long lasting healthy relationship, meaning that anything built solely on love is eventually sooner or later bound to crumble.

 

There are more vital dimensions of relationships than love

Love is most certainly one of the things we desire and expect for a healthy relationship, but not all we need, many marriage experts also argue the validity of its necessity to begin with, but I’m gonna hold a neutral position and say that a relationship needs compatibilityو mutual respect, communication, common and shared values, goals and interests much more than love to be successful, healthy, and long lasting.

 

It’s also worth to note that true compatibility does not exist, but a certain reasonable level of it does, so you have to shrug off the minor little things.

I urge you to keep an open mind about this matter, which may mean abolishing some fantasies like “love is all we need”, but think about when love evaporates eventually in 2-3 years, and romance fades, what then? what is holding the two of you together? It was statistically proven numerous times that people who marry someone for reasons other than love attain a long and more sustainable relationship, these reasons vary from individuals who marry partners because they believe they would be a great parent, or marry for companionship or even financial security, the more reasons the more roots of your relationship become strong and firm in the ground.

Now don’t misunderstand, love is nice to have and helps the relationship to begin strong and may contributes greatly to it’s initial stages, but there needs to be more to your relationship than love for it to have a healthy long lasting marriage.

(+) Reference: